Just Women Talking Shit
Just Women Talking Shit is your go-to self-help podcast for real talk on personal & spiritual growth. Hosted by Jacquelynn Cotten, personal evolution mentor & founder of Spiritual Support System, this podcast features juicy interviews with badass, one-of-a-kind women. We dive deep into the good 💩, bad 💩, weird 💩, & life 💩, offering insights & inspiration to help you live a more authentic, fulfilled life. Join us for relatable stories, expert advice, & practical tips on overcoming challenges, building resilience, & embracing your true self. Tune in & start your journey towards personal evolution today!
Just Women Talking Shit
Ep 87: Transforming Trauma: Holistic Healing & Subconscious Reprogramming with Jacquelynn Rene Cotten
Have you ever wondered how your past traumas could be affecting your physical body and overall well-being? Join me, Jacquelynn Rene Cotten, as I share my deeply personal story of overcoming childhood neglect, homelessness, addiction, and mental health struggles. Learn about the profound connection between trauma and the nervous system, and how holistic healing approaches such as neuroscience, wellness practices, and mindset work can help you transform your pain into power.
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In this episode of "Just Women Talking Shit," we explore the critical importance of reprogramming the subconscious mind to attract abundance and facilitate healing. You'll discover how to break free from survival mode and negative thought patterns through practical techniques like affirmations, subliminals, meditations, and visualizations. Understand the science behind the power of repetition in forming new neural pathways, and how hypnosis can accelerate your transformation, allowing you to perceive the world with a more positive outlook.
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We also shed light on the vital role of somatic practices in releasing stored trauma and promoting emotional and physical well-being. From energy healing and breath work to emotional freedom techniques (EFT) and shadow work, we unravel the methods that can help you clear energetic blockages and invite high-vibe energy into your life. Embrace your inner strength and resilience by addressing past traumas, nurturing your inner child, and manifesting the life you desire. Listen in as we empower you to reprogram your subconscious mind and unlock your true potential.
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Ladies and gentlemen, you're listening to Just Women Talking Shit with your host, jacqueline Cotton. Well, hi, welcome back to a live recording of Just Women Talking Shit so excited to have you here. Today. We're going to be diving into what I feel like is a super important topic, and that is healing trauma, something that I have lots of personal experience with, something that I help a lot of my clients with, something that I help every year at my annual retreat with, and so I'm really excited to talk about this. I'm really excited to help you all navigate trauma in a way that maybe you have not been exposed to yet. So we're going to explore some powerful trauma and trauma healing techniques in this episode and, of course, I'll be tying in my specialty of energetics and manifesting with trauma healing because, let's be real, you cannot manifest your dream life if you're carrying around heavy trauma energy. This is the emotional baggage, this is the insecurities, the lack of confidence or belief in yourself. These are the self-sabotaging behaviors that were likely instilled at a very young age or from something trauma related. So, for those who don't know my story, first off, hi, I'm Jacqueline, jacqueline Renee Cotton and I live out in Mississippi. I have a pretty crazy story. I've been in some dark places and I still frequently visit dark places because of my trauma, because of the childhood neglect and my unfortunate upbringing that still affects me to this day. I've experienced homelessness, addiction, mental health struggles, really you name it. But I turned my life around using neuroscience, holistic wellness, mindset work Okay, in combination with some of these techniques that I'm going to be teaching you today. So that's more of the holistic approach for me is the healing techniques and the activities and exercises that allow you to turn this pain into power. Grab your smoke, if you smoke. Grab your drink. I'm drinking chocolate milk Nothing fancy, although I guess it's fancy milk if you add chocolate. But trauma, trauma, drama. If you're watching this live or if you're listening to this on the replay of the podcast episode and you have experienced trauma, save this video or save the episode and come back to it if you can't listen to it all right now, because you likely need to hear this and I think I'm one of those people who I don't believe in coincidences, so I'd be willing to say that you likely need to hear this, and I think I'm one of those people who I don't believe in coincidences, so I'd be willing to say that you're supposed to hear this today or right now, and if you can't listen to it right now, save it for later.
Speaker 1:I want to share what I've learned with you throughout the years so that you can turn your pain into power. So let's jump into how you can heal your trauma and step into your power unapologetically, and live a life that is authentically aligned, that lights you up, that makes you happy, that does not hang over your head with regret. Okay, and I think that the foundation for you in all of this is understanding trauma and also taking it a step further and understanding energy, so that you can understand what trauma does to your energy and what trauma does to your energetic field, but also what trauma does to your body, because it's doing some crazy shit to your body and you're likely not aware of it until I start talking about this, and if you are aware of it, you're probably curious how to make it stop. So let's start with trauma itself. Trauma is not just what happens to us. It's how our bodies store the energy. So when trauma something that happens to you, but the after effect can be stored in your body, because what happens is when you're experiencing trauma, you're experiencing fight or flight you've heard of that, right? So your body's nervous system is designed to, to, to get you the fuck out of there, or to fight your way out, and and so when, especially when, you experience something like CPTSD or PTSD, the trauma has not been resolved, and so your body stores it and you can have triggers at any moment, anytime.
Speaker 1:It could be a smell, it could be the way somebody speaks to you, it could be a tone, it could be just a familiar place. Anything could spark a smell. It could be the way somebody speaks to you, it could be a tone, it could be just a familiar place. Anything could spark a memory, and your body will actually feel the effects of replaying these stories in your mind. Some of the ways that it comes out A fast heartbeat. It can come out in the forms of nausea, feeling nervous. Some people even get sick when they feel a threat in their environment or they feel like they're getting into into unknown territory, unknown or uncharted waters. I've worked with clients who I truly believe their defense mechanism is to develop a sickness in order to avoid growth, and it's crazy. It's crazy what, what the mind can do to your body, but you have to remember it is the central nervous system of the whole thing, right, central unit of the whole system. So think about that, think about how you know trauma is stored in your body energetically and you may be even be able to write down some symptoms when you think about this.
Speaker 1:So, for instance, me myself my experience is so. I have really bad CPTSD from childhood, throughout my adolescent years, up until really just a few years ago when my daughter's dad died, and I'm still dealing with it. And the way it comes out for me is in social settings and, um, when I come out of sleep it really affects me. So I don't look forward to falling asleep, I don't look forward to waking up, and the reason for that is because of the way I woke up for so many years. I woke up with dread. I woke up a lot of the time being yelled at, being told I was worthless, a piece of shit, everything was my fault. Or I was woken up with, you know, people screaming, fighting, verbal abuse, physical abuse, all kinds of domestic violence, hardcore drugs. I've been in, you know, woken up in the middle of the night or at odd, odd hours of the morning by by people, right, you know, like going through things, trying to to find drugs, like.
Speaker 1:So it makes sense why. Why, when I wake up in the morning or even after a nap or anything, that my body freaks out because I have so much nervous energy stored and in my body from from all the years that my body doesn't quite know how to respond and so it comes out in really weird ways. And maybe I share that with you because maybe you can resonate or relate to it and it may spark some of your symptoms and make you aware of them. And, and I know, for me it took hearing other people's stories to understand that what I was feeling was not just from nothing, from nothing for no reason. It was based on past circumstances. So it really helped me to understand so that I could evolve and start to turn this pain into power, this pain into power. So trauma disrupts your emotional and your energetic field and when you realize that, it's a lot easier to catch yourself in moments so that you can try to correct this trauma and turn it into something beautiful, here's the thing your body holds on to trauma in your nervous system and in your cells. So that's why you might find yourself reacting to situations that seem over but still feel raw inside. This is why it is so important to understand healing trauma requires energetic work, and this is where I come in.
Speaker 1:This is where my shift sessions come in. If you want to book one of those, those are absolutely free. You get 20 minutes and we will buckle down and shift the energy around your problems or around whatever you're unclear in. So you can comment, shift and book one of those. I also have hypnotherapy sessions and those are. You can book one at a time for $111, or you can book six at a time and you can get them for $555 and save some money. So those are the ways that I can help you with that. And I also have my retreat, and this is where we do a lot of the in-person work.
Speaker 1:This is where we're like actually dealing with the physical aspects of the trauma and we're releasing it. So this comes through beautiful activities like a sacred rage ceremony and you know, identifying, being able to identify in that moment what's blocking you and then like actually working through it, not in a like let's just write and script kind of way, but in a way that actually releases the energy from your body that you've been storing and holding onto for quite some time to for quite some time, and it is such a an animalistic experience, but such a freeing one that, just like doing it once, set something, set something off in you that it all of a sudden makes sense why, why you've been so, maybe, uptight, or why you withdraw whenever you get in certain situations, or why your body draws up, or why your stomach starts to hurt, or you you name your pain that feels as if it's not yours and there's probably a reason for that, and it can come out through this kind of work. So we're talking about, I guess, the energetic work, release work, somatic work, stuff like that. So, from an energetic standpoint, trauma keeps you vibrating at a lower frequency, because if you are continuously replaying the past, if you're continuously replaying these narratives and you know, in a sense, feeling sorry for yourself, that is going to affect your mood, and your mood over time is going to just become you know how people kind of see you from the outside, and that kind of becomes your identity. And so, before you know it, you've kind of lost control of the reins and your trauma is leading the show once again, and so you've got to be able to put yourself back into that driver's seat and recognize in these moments, and then use some of these techniques. So think about, like, fear, shame, anger these are really big ones. That's a low, low frequency. Now, if you want to take that low frequency and transmute it into something greater, that's where the release work, the rage work, the like, actually moving the energy comes into play. Because what happens is a lot of us sit with it and we, like you know, kind of sulk in it and we replay it over and over in our heads and all that does is keeps you stuck in the past, so much that you're stuck in the past that you can't, like, really plan for the future. So moving it, moving the energy, all that is going to is going to allow you to to kind of move past that. So transmuting it is is a beautiful way to allow yourself to heal.
Speaker 1:Because, again, my dog just got out here. That was my daughter and I kind of shoot her off. But my dog's out here now and I want to use her as like an example. If you ever see two dogs getting into, you know, an altercation, you'll see them when they're done or when they get out of a bath or when they're shaken, there she does. She just did it right now. She shook herself and she shakes the energy off. And so I want you to think about like a dog and think about how animals in general, when they are, when they are infuriated or when they are, you know, energized, and then they need to cool down, they shake it off and they release that. And they release that there's. I'm sure they're not sitting there thinking about you know what what? What junior in the doghouse next door was did to him yesterday and how he's gonna like relish in that plan vengeance. Um, they just like shake it off.
Speaker 1:So kind of think about that whenever you think about moving energy and getting past that energetic entanglement that you're keeping yourself stuck in because of what's happened to you in the past. So we want to think about ourselves as like high frequencies and when we feel low, we want to ask ourselves like how can we feel a little bit better? How can we work past this? How can we heal this in some way, even if it's just a little bit, so that we can quit repeating the same stories and living in this pain and we can step into the power? So if you want to heal, you've got to learn to raise that frequency because, in order to manifest a life that you really desire, you can't stay stuck in the past. You can't stay stuck in the trauma and playing victim Not that you weren't a victim, but in continuing the victimship and in continuing this story of I'm a victim, you've got to show from survival mode to be able to attract the abundance. Whenever you're stuck in this lack, it creates this energetic field around you and it feels like you will maybe never get out of it.
Speaker 1:Read this one more time, because I didn't say it the way I wrote it. You can't attract abundance when your energy is stuck in survival mode. It may seem like you know you have these high moments, but then you're right back down to a low moment. You might have a high moment and then you find yourself kind of sabotaging it for yourself, like you get your hopes high and then everything falls through. And the reason for this is typically because of the energetics behind the scenes. The energetics often don't back up what you say you desire, what you say you want, what you want out of life. You say you want to move past the trauma, but you continue to gossip and you continue to retell and rehash the same stories and not rehearse your future. You'll never move past it. So let's talk about some effective Let me say that again. Let's talk about some effective trauma healing techniques.
Speaker 1:One and this is my favorite reprogramming your subconscious. This is something that I'm really good at and I'm really good at walking my clients through as well. I've got a lot of effective techniques. We do meditations, we do subliminals. They record them themselves and then they send them to me and I lay them on tracks because my background is in like music and video and all that kind of stuff, and and it's like a. It's a really quick way to retrain the subconscious, because you're supposed to trust yourself the most and it teaches you to trust yourself and it just it hits the subconscious in a different way, much quicker, because it's a voice that you recognize and that you you learn to trust, or you should already trust, versus some stranger on youtube that you don't know yeah, he's got a sexy accent, but you don't know him, you don't trust him and so I've got a lot of effective techniques, uh, but reprogramming the subconscious is super, super effective. This first technique is all about reprogramming your subconscious mind, and this is where you know, affirmations, subliminals, meditations, repetition is what we're looking for. This is where all of those kinds of things, including visualization, come into play. All of those kinds of things, including visualization, come into play.
Speaker 1:Now, you're probably wondering why, and it's because your mind believes what you repeatedly tell it. So, for instance, if you think you suck, if you think that the world is, you know, just a terrible place and you're never going to get ahead, and you see the world in a negative light, odds are you're going to continue to find things to feel negative about. You'll continue to attract situations, people, predicaments that continue to justify your belief, continue to justify your belief. Now, I think I said it earlier, but your perception is what creates your reality. So if you've got a shit perception, your life is going to be very predictably shitty, because you have a bad mindset to begin with, and so you're always going to find the worst in everything.
Speaker 1:So, think energy vampires, think negative Nancys, debbie Downers. Ok, these are the people that we're thinking about, and if you find yourself fulfilling one of these roles and really identifying with it, then it's OK. This is your level of awareness, this is your plug inin point to be able to, to rewire your subconscious and let's revamp and reinvent who it is you want to become. So if your mind repeatedly, if your mind believes what you repeatedly tell it, then we can replace all of the self-limiting beliefs, all of the traumatic events, all of the emotions which emotions are just the end result of an experience. Does that make sense? Emotions are the end result of an experience and so if we can experience new feelings, we can create new emotions. So there is hope, there's lots of hope for you.
Speaker 1:By visualizing you healed yourself, yourself and by affirming your new beliefs, you're literally rewiring your brain. So you want to do the same things every day. You want to tell yourself the same things every day. You want to affirm who it is you want to become and you want to affirm the new story that you want to make your life. So we have to get in this power of repetition, because at first it's going to feel like bullshit. It's going to feel like such bullshit.
Speaker 1:The mindset work, all the positive affirmations, like. None of it feels real at first and we have to, like you know, crawl and then take baby steps as we go. But we start with the things that that we, that we feel we can work towards, and that is that's hope. That's, that's enough to start, if you can just commit to like just one day at a time and then, and then take it a step further. And that step is typically just taking one more step so that we create momentum and then over time it compounds, and then you, before you know it, find yourself in this new identity. You find yourself not wanting to to go back to your old ways. You find yourself noticing more positive things, or you start to realize all the opportunities in front of you because your neural pathways start to form in a different way, so that you just automatically see the good in everything, the good in the world, the good in life, right? So rewiring the subconscious is extremely effective.
Speaker 1:If you want to dive into a session with me, what you want to do is you want to dive into a hypnosis session with me. You can book one, or you can book six for the price of five, and all you gotta do is comment hypnosis and I'll send you some information. Or if you're listening to this on the podcast, you're going to want to check the show notes for that link. And this can segue into neuroscience, which is one of my all-time fucking favorite things to talk about, because it has changed my life. It has changed my entire life. Neuroscience shows that the neurons in your brain fire together, or the ones that fire together can wire together.
Speaker 1:Now, it does take time, it does take practice and it takes repetition, but basically think about it like habit stacking. So let's say that you don't enjoy, let's say you have a business and you don't enjoy building your audience, engaging and attracting new followers. It kind of feels ick, it feels like. But if you were to take that practice and then you were to pair it with something fun, we could rewire this business activity, which is a money generating activity, which is something you must do. You must create visibility for your business. You must do this frequently and consistently in order to attract people to even want to buy from you, right. So we think about habit stacking. Then you can essentially rewire yourself to look forward to it. So let's say that you don't look forward to the reach outs, but it's so necessary. So if you're not going to delegate it to somebody else and hire it out and you're in a spot where it's something that you have to be hands-on with right now, stack that habit with something you enjoy.
Speaker 1:So I love chocolate milk. Ever since I've been on my health kick, I've cut out alcohol. I have maybe one or two beers a month and that's like with dinner or something every once in a while if I'm in the mood. So I've replaced it with chocolate milk. So what I could do is I could stack this chocolate milk with the thing, the activity that I don't look forward to.
Speaker 1:So that's the way we think about rewiring the brain too. If we do it enough, through the power of repetition, we can rewire neural pathways, reform them in a way that favors us, in a way that supports who we say we want to become, that supports the finances of the person we want to become, supports the overall characteristics, success rate, all the things. The healthy thing, because you learn to navigate life and thoughts and downloads and opportunities in a new way, because you've now taught your brain to do something completely different which is going to, over time, create and attract new results. Is this making sense? Let me know. Let me know if you're picking up what I'm putting down. So the more you focus on healing your trauma, the more you focus on now.
Speaker 1:I'm not talking about replaying it over and over and over again, but I'm talking about actively replacing these feelings with new feelings, actively creating experiences in your life to replace the experiences that are energetically weighing you down. Okay, so, with knowing that, with knowing that you can, you can start today creating new habits, new beliefs. We can start going through this trauma and unpacking it in a healthy way, through techniques that support you and do not harm anybody. Do not harm you, do not harm others, do not harm you, do not harm others, but allow you to release the trauma and the pain so that you can turn it into power. Do you think that you feel a little bit lighter? Do you think that if the techniques I'm about to teach you, if they feel doable for you, that you can take that step in that direction to actually finally heal this shit?
Speaker 1:Is that something that sounds more attractive or does it still feel heavy? Because if it still feels heavy, we got to go back and figure out why we don't want to heal this yet. Is it a defense mechanism? Is it something that has protected us up until this point? And in doing that, then you have to do some safety work, and safety work requires you to be vulnerable, honest, transparent with yourself, and it forces you to think about all the great you have in your life and all that you have going for you already, and it forces you to realize that maybe it's not as bad as is your mind is making it out to be, and that you are safe that you do have the fundamental and the necessity. There are the fundamental things and necessities that you need right now, right. So focus on the feelings you want to embody. If you continue to tell yourself the same stories, if you continue to rehash the past instead of rehearsing your future self, your future life, trauma free version of you, then you have to start allowing yourself to actually feel those things. So embody those feelings.
Speaker 1:Emotional release and somatic work is one of my favorite ways to heal trauma. I did not know this until a couple years ago, when I hosted my first retreat. Couple years ago, when I hosted my first retreat and the co-host that I was leading it with at the time she led what she called a sacred rage ceremony and it was a somatic exercise where we took a pillow and a pillowcase and we wrapped it around our hands and we had to get into the mindset and, you know, rehash some things, replay them in our minds and allow whatever came out to come out. And in doing that, you feel a lot of rage and you scream and you cry and you punch and you hit and both times that I experienced it this last time was like really heavy and I released a lot and I beat the shit out of that pillow, that poor pillow. It started this big, like this big, and then it went, what that went in front.
Speaker 1:But I realized the importance, like the importance of actually moving energy and I said earlier, like you know, if you think about a dog or an animal, how they shake the energy off. This is when I realized that we do, we do need to allow ourselves, when we feel angry, hurt, sad, violent, we need to allow ourselves to feel those things and to release it. And there are healthy ways to do that. So emotional release and somatic work is really big. So we're thinking, if we now know that trauma gets stuck in the body, then it makes sense to want to release that energy. So let's talk next about, you know, the emotional release through somatic work. Trauma gets stuck in the body, as I said, so we need to release it physically. So if that means that you know, writing in a journal, meditating and doing all the mind work. It's not going to be enough. Okay, it's not going to be enough, because these things are stored in your body.
Speaker 1:Now, if you go back then, we talked about symptoms that you may experience Rapid heart rate, sweaty palms, a feeling of nervousness, you may get really bad anxiety, you may go into a panic attack, you may start having flashbacks, out-of-body experiences. There are so many side effects that people experience because of trauma, hallucinations even. And so if we can feel these things in our body and we continue to hide them, because, let's be real, like I know, when I was a kid, uh, therapists and psychiatrists were called shrinks. It was such like you did not go see a shrink and if you did, you did not talk about it. And if you talked about it, um, it was you making fun of shrinks, like nobody would acknowledge that antidepressants were, you know, frowned upon. Shame, shame, shame. It was like you were wearing the scarlet letter of anxiety.
Speaker 1:And so we've been taught to hide these feelings, to hide the bad feelings and to only show the good feelings, to always keep buttoned up and proper, you know, like got to remain proper and be a lady and all the things, when the truth is, a lot of us have experienced a lot of hurt and we have a lot of rage that we need to get out of our bodies because a lot of people have hurt us or have done things without our permission, and so we need to release these things. So this is really when the somatic work comes in and the energy healing comes in, and that's something that I offer in person. You can book one-on-one sessions with me, or I would really just recommend go ahead and get a spot at this year's I mean at the 2025 retreat, so that you can experience it in person and just have like a really good weekend to reset anyway and come hang out with me. It's going to be lots of fun. Maybe you want information on that comment retreat and I'll send you the details. So you really do.
Speaker 1:You need to release it physically, and this can be done through numerous avenues. You could do it through breath work. I love breath work. The breath work is really really effective for anxiety. It's really helpful for slowing your heart rate back down.
Speaker 1:I do it in the mornings. I also do what I call it like um it's. I channel my inner shaman. I don't know why I do this. It just, it just happens. And I've learned that when you have feelings or like you feel your body needs to make a sound or you feel your body needs to move a certain way, it's energy that needs to come out. And so, like, don't judge yourself. But one thing that I do that and my husband knows that I'm in a lot of pain in the morning because he'll hear me in my shaman mode and one thing that helps me a lot is as I breathe I will let out really deep frequencies. So you're thinking like sometimes I'll go as low as I can, um, but you mess with frequencies. So for me it helps. It slows the heart rate, it actually opens the blood vessels, blood vessels. I didn't know this, but I was intuitively drawn to do this, like shaman, shamanic belching. Some people are drawn to do that and that's how they move energy. But breath work is a really great way.
Speaker 1:You could start with just something as simple as holding for three seconds, breathing in through the nose, big breath out, big breath out, like a loud breath from the mouth. Get used to that. Maybe three seconds in, three seconds out, you can feel yourself, release energy, release trauma, because a lot of us are holding on to what we call stale breath, stale breath, carbon. You know the, the, the. What is it? Carb? Is it carbon dioxide that we need to release? If you want to look into that, it is called stale breath. There's Chinese practices, you can look into it. It is called Still Breath. There's Chinese practices, you can look into it and they will tell you a lot more about it than I can educate you on. But a lot of us do not even stop to get full breaths. We are just stuck in shallow breathing.
Speaker 1:And so when you allow yourself to go outside, you know, maybe get some house plants or plant some some plants around outside, like allowing yourself to get fresh oxygen, to have plants working for you, to allow you to stop and remind yourself to take a deep breath, like these. These things do help. So breath work, breath work, eft, that is emotional freedom technique. That's going to be your tapping. You know emotions and tapping on some pressure points. This is a way to help you reprogram and kind of replace some feelings, some emotions. So emotional freedom technique, you can check that out. Or even you know just movement, whether it be exercising, going for a walk, going for a run if you like to swim, if you like to do yoga, if you have a punching bag, if you want to get that pillow and just beat the shit out of the bed today, that works too.
Speaker 1:Moving your body is so necessary to release trauma, to heal. Okay, because we do. We hold on to these things in our cells and fat cells in our bones. So getting these toxins out, replacing, you know, maybe, some not so good behaviors like sitting and watching a little too much TV, a little too much housewives, eating some Cheetos, whatever your little habits are replacing them with something like moving your body is such a good way to start healing your past, because it's real hard to think about the past all the time when you were continuously moving forward. So think about that. If you want to have a dance party, fucking do it. Put on a good playlist, do it, do it. You don't have to have a reason, just do it. So we've got our we've. We've went over the reprogramming, the subconscious mind, right. We've went over some energy release and somatic work. Now let's go over some inner child and shadow work.
Speaker 1:I love shadow work. I love inner child work. If you watch my stories, you'll see me hop in here and on the days that I'm having shit days, I'll be like what's little Jacqueline want to do? What is inner child me want to do? Because we're just children and grown up bodies. Think about that for a second. Like I don't feel I. I mean my body hurts and my body feels old, but like my mind, I still laugh at like stupid, stupid things. Like if somebody says the word do do too close together, like if you're like, yeah, I do that. I'm laughing because all I can think about is you shitting yourself. My mind is not completely aged and so when you think about that and you think about the fact that probably a lot of your trauma is from childhood, doing that inner child work, doing the shadow work, it can be life changing work.
Speaker 1:Doing the shadow work, it can be life changing because a lot of our trauma stems from unmet needs in childhood or repressed emotions that we buried. So shadow work allows you to face those parts of yourself that you've pushed away. Here's the thing Healing trauma requires us to get comfortable with the uncomfortable. That's why it's called your comfort zone, bitch right. You have to get comfortable with becoming uncomfortable. That is, on the other side of discomfort is growth, baby growth. I mean, you work out your muscles, you're going to hurt for a few days and it's going to continue to happen, but over time, like you're going to check yourself out in the mirror and you'll be like, oh shit, all right, totally worth it. Totally worth it. By addressing the wounds that have been hiding for so long in the shadows, we integrate those parts into ourselves now and we're able to heal so some of the dark parts that I wanted to hide so much about myself.
Speaker 1:You know, like sexuality, I was really ashamed of my sexuality growing up in the Bible Belt. It is not respected, it is looked down on to be a bisexual female and then, you know, I didn't accept, I guess, my taste for intimacy until my husband, and that's because I had to heal a lot of shit. I had to feel safe in my body, I had to feel secure and I had to feel seen and loved and supported before I could, like really explore what deep intimacy and you know that kind of relationship looks like with somebody and actually enjoy sex because of you know, the sexual abuse, the sexual trauma that I experienced, not only as a kid but as an adolescent and as an adult. And so how do you heal that? You have to work through the shadow so that you can work past it. Um, but it wasn't until, you know, I started to to, to, to realize the, the trauma that came with the sexual abuse and that came with, you know, from my cousins and and other people that forced themselves on me or heavily pushed themselves on me, um and so, but if, if I, if I don't allow myself to work through the shadow and if you don't allow yourself to visit that, to visit the dark place and just be like you know what?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I got a freaky side, not even just a freaky side, but I mean like a shady side. I call my shadow self Shady Cheryl. She gets shady, she gets a little hairy, she gets a little scary, she gets a little shy. But what I found is that in owning my darkness and owning my quirkiness and owning the shit that makes me weird, you know, I was told a lot when I was a kid you're too loud, like you're too bossy, you think you know everything, and I and I took that as like, okay, that's not, those aren't good things. But it's so funny that the things that we bitch about in kids are the exact things that we commend people for as adults. So I want you to think about that. You know your dark, the dark, the dark parts of you. Are they dark? Or are they just? You know? Have you kind of entered this phase of shame because someone either didn't like it or didn't agree with it, or it's just? You know, I heard a lot. That's not how we do things. So working through that is going to to allow you to own those parts instead of pushing them away.
Speaker 1:So, all right, manifesting through trauma and trauma healing. So how necessarily does this all tie into manifesting? You're probably wondering right about now. Trauma creates energetic blockages, okay, and those blockages keep you from attracting what you want. You, you might want abundance, but if you're vibrating at the frequency of shame or fear, you're going to manifest more of that, I can assure you. Healing is the key to raising your vibration. Once you clear out old trauma energy, you open up so much space for new, high vibrating energy to come in. This high vibrating energy will come in the form, yes, of money, but I want you to think so much more past that, because money is not not even what you really want. You want the feelings that you think you'll feel from all the money.
Speaker 1:But if you could just focus on that for a minute and think about how abundance could also come into your life. It's in the people, it's in the new relationships, it's in the opportunities for growth. It's in, you know, getting on that stage or standing in front of an audience that you're scared to speak in front of, but that could open up a whole new portal of possibilities. For so you start to realize that you've been blocking abundance in so many ways by staying stuck in this trauma, stuck in these energetic blocks, because when you feel stuck, you don't say yes as much. You don't see the green lights as much you see red lights, you see all the things that could go wrong and you think so far into the future could go wrong, and you think so far into the future, based on your past, that it's really hard to even see what's possible for you at that point. You know so, um, once you clear out that old trauma energy, you open up space for new high vibe energy to come in, whether it's abundance, love or success, resilience and mental health. Let's touch base on this real quick Healing trauma also builds resilience.
Speaker 1:Think about how fucking strong you are, how far you've come, like you are a solid human being, ma'am or sir. The more you practice these techniques, the more resilient you become, and resilience is what helps you face future challenges okay, so that you can approach them without being completely knocked down. So in having these techniques, I want you to think about it as like a toolkit Going forward. You have the tools you can work through this. You don't have to keep repeating the same generational mistakes.
Speaker 1:Your mental health is tied directly to your energy. I want you to think about that for a second. Checking in with your energy each day is a really powerful way to support your mental health. So I like to cut, I like to hop in with my clients and I'll and in the 14-day cash energetics a high cash energetics challenge I have going on right now, we do energy check ins and I do it with my husband too. I call them relationship check ins for us, but energy check ins and I have to do them with myself.
Speaker 1:So if you find yourself feeling low vibe energy, it's important that you acknowledge in that moment and you go okay, wait, hold up. What's going on? I feel like shit. I'm feeling. I'm feeling a little down. You know my mental health is not feeling great, and it's important that in that moment you recognize, you recognize what you're feeling, because when your feelings are low, when your self-worth is low, when your self-esteem is low, that's a low frequency. And you can tell based on body language, based on eating habits, based on the way you talk to yourself All really, there are a lot of indicators, indicators and then you can tell when someone is high energy, is tuning into their energy, is making their energy a human project, is respecting their energy, honoring their energy, nurturing their energy and doing energy check-ins.
Speaker 1:You can tell because they're confident, they walk tall, they walk with purpose, they always sit and listen, they don't have to talk all the time, they are really level-headed and they seem to have this sense of inner peace. That's what you really want to go for and you can tell the difference. You can tell the difference when you do those energy check-ins, when you do that observation, an ocular pat down of your energy and your energetic field. That's going to allow you to either amplify the high frequencies or correct the low frequencies, by either transmuting them and releasing the energy so that you can let it go, or finding something that will make you feel a bit better. And, oh my gosh, if you want a free guide that will blow your freaking mind with this, because your feelings equal frequencies.
Speaker 1:This is something that I teach. You want to go ahead and comment frequencies, because frequencies is going to allow you to get an, a completely free guide that I created. That is fucking genius and it works wonders. It teaches you to take your feelings, use them as feedback so that you can take the feelings that you believe you'll feel from what you want to attract, and then we create the feelings in your body now so that you can align with the frequencies and kind of just like create a one-way path so that they get to you sooner. If you want that free PDF, all you gotta do is comment frequencies and you can have it. My treat. So check in with your energy each day so that you can support your mental health and not want to burn it all down every time things get hard. All right.
Speaker 1:So to wrap this up, trauma doesn't define you. I'm going to give you some actionable steps in my recap, actionable tips that you can do with all of these techniques, but for now, I just want to remind you that your trauma, it does not define you. You are not your trauma, you are not your past, you are not whatever has happened to you. Fuck that. Nope, you're way more powerful than that and you are going to do great things. Your success is inevitable. It's only a matter of time. It's only a matter of time that you realize how powerful you are and you take control of that and you harness that and you work through it and then you go out there and you turn your pain into power. So your trauma doesn't define you. It's heavy, yes, yes, it's heavy, but you have the power to heal and shift your energy into a place where you can manifest the life you truly desire.
Speaker 1:I'm doing it. I'm doing it, my clients are doing it. It's beautiful. It's beautiful work. It's hard work, but it's necessary. And if it was easy, everybody would be doing it and everybody would be shitting rain corns and rain corns, rainbows and unicorns and, you know, have that pot of gold. But a lot of people don't want to lean into. You know, a little bit of pain to get to the pleasure. So, if you want to dive deeper, I mentioned earlier my shift sessions. They're 20-minute shift sessions. They're completely free and you can book one for the next couple weeks, I just have a limited amount. So if you go and you go to book one and the next couple of weeks, I just have a limited amount. So if, if you go and you go to book one and there's availability, that means that, uh, there's availability and if it's not up, then you just want to check back at some um, some later point in time and check to see when the schedule's opened up again so you can book a shift session. You can come to the retreat in 2025. That's going to be in Banner Elk, north Carolina.
Speaker 1:And then, if, if you want to chime in, I mean, if you want to hop into the high cash energetics, today's day one, you'll be a little bit behind, but today you can join that and you can be in there and caught up by tomorrow, but today's the last day I'm letting anybody join. So you just want to comment energetics for that. If you want the free feelings, equal frequencies, the guide to becoming an energetic match for your dream life, pdf, comment frequencies and that'll get sent over. Hmm, what else do I have? Hmm, what else do I have? Oh, if you'd like to work in a more one-on-one environment with me, I have something called mobile mentorship and what that looks like is you get, monday through Friday, 9 am to 5 pm, central Standard Time, with me and we go back and forth through voice, memos, through texts, through videos, trainings, resources all the things you need in real time, and so you get it's like on-demand coaching. To take it a step further, if you want the one-on-one calls in addition to the mobile mentorship, I do have some spots available for one-on-one mentorship right now. You just want to comment, apply and I'll send you an application to do that.
Speaker 1:I have VIP days, which I'm really excited about, because someone is booking one of those and coming to Mississippi to spend a weekend with me, and I'm just over the moon about it. I'm so freaking over the moon about it, but those are a little bit pricier. You're looking at about $2,500 for the day, um, but you get a whole, a whole day with me and and, frankly, if you come to Mississippi, you'll probably see me all weekend, because I love to love on my people, um, but it's just such a potent, potent way to experience the energy work, the neuroscience work, the healing, the energetics. I like to cook, I like to go around and be in nature and I could show you my neck of the woods, but there's lots. There's just lots to experience here that I like to show, that I think a lot of people don't know about, and so you've got your VIP days. If you want me to travel to you, if you are a baller and you want to holler, that is a five-figure investment and I will come to you for a VIP weekend. I think that's all I've got for y'all. I love you so much.
Speaker 1:I hope that this episode has reached you. I hope that you share it with someone who you think could benefit from it. Maybe who you want to see flourish and live a life that they truly deserve, someone that has so much potential and holds themselves back. Maybe you share it with them, or maybe you just love this episode and want to pop it in your stories, one of your takeaways. Feel free to tag me at Spiritual Support System and you can tag the show at Just Women Talking Shit, both on Instagram.
Speaker 1:Don't forget to leave a review for this episode, whether you're watching it on Instagram or listening to it. Wherever you get your podcasts, please take a moment just to go on Spotify and you can rate it with stores, and then what really matters to me is the Apple podcast. It means so very much that all my guests, all my interviewees and all of my listeners go and leave a review, because I'm just a little. I'm just a little Southern woman out in Mississippi sitting on her back porch doing this thing on my own, and I know that it doesn't have to be perfect for it to reach the right people, and I also know that if we can work together and do these reviews, it's only going to amplify the beautiful, beautiful movement that I am creating within this crazy, crazy world. But that's all I've got. Oh, my actionable tips before we go, because I don't want you to leave this episode or this live stream without knowing what to do next.
Speaker 1:So, to reprogram your subconscious mind, what you can do is try this like every day Spend five minutes visualizing the person you want to be healed, happy and whole. Ok, focus on the feelings you want to embody for emotional release and somatic work. If you're listening to this right now, you can start with something simple. If you're listening to this right now, you can start with something simple. It's like take a few breaths, notice where you're holding tension and exhale it out. Acknowledge whatever you're feeling. You can look up breath work exercises on the internet. I highly recommend an app that I teach on and that is called Insight Timer. I trust that one. You never know what you're going to get on YouTube.
Speaker 1:So for inner child and shadow work, you can try this journal prompt. What unmet needs did my younger self have that I still carry today? How can I nurture my inner child? Now? That's a beautiful prompt. Write and see what comes out. It's very, very liberating. You may cry, you may feel some things. I know I cried, but it's necessary. It's necessary to feel these things and to not suppress them anymore so that you can move past them. Ok for OK.
Speaker 1:I want you to create this is for the manifesting, the manifesting through trauma healing. So this is where I mentioned my feelings equal frequencies guide. But what you could do is you could create your own feelings equal frequencies list. Write down the feelings you want to experience. You know if it's peace, joy, confidence, abundance, feeling on top of the the world, whatever it is you want to feel. Write all those down and then use those feelings as guides, like a guy, like a goalpost guidepost really, and when you raise your emotional frequency, notice that those feelings are the feelings that you want to feel. So, for instance, if you want, if you want to have a life that you feel completely limitless in, you could go jump on a trampoline with your kids, or even by yourself, and you could jump and then. Or even by yourself, and you could jump and then feel as if you are limitless in that moment. You could set that intention and you do feel limitless because you are. You feel like you're floating on air. You're jumping, like it feels incredible, like you're defying gravity for a second. And so these are. These are little ways, but again, grab that guide. It's super helpful. And so these are. These are little ways, but again, grab that guide. It's super helpful.
Speaker 1:When we talked about resilience and mental health, an actionable tip that you could take away from this is this quick grounding exercise that I love every morning take two minutes to check in with yourself. Okay, where's my energy today If it's low? Use one of the techniques that we shared in this episode, like breathwork or visualization. My mouth doesn't want to say that word. So, like breathwork or visualization. Okay, we're not going to say that word again Three times. I'm going to sound like a moron. Okay, we're not going to say that word again three times, I'm going to sound like a moron, but you can do these things to reset. I'm going to finish my chocolate milk, finish my smoke and go to bed.
Speaker 1:I hope you've loved this. Have a beautiful day evening, whatever time of the day it is. When you hear this have that time of the day. Make is when you hear this have that time of the day, make it beautiful on purpose. And remember that you're not your trauma, you're not your past. You can be anything you desire. You can be anybody you want to be. You can shift your identity. You can make as much money as you want to make. You can be lazy and make money. You can sell pickles and make money. I don't know. I don't know what you want to do, but you can do it and I believe in you and I think you're fucking awesome. So take that if you want it, or you could just leave it here, but either way, I love you. Thank you for listening to me today on this episode of Just Women Talking Shit, until next time. It's been real, it's been fun. It's been real fun. I love you so much. Catch you later. Question for a question. You're going wild.
